3. Making Lists to Make Changes

Here’s a glimpse of how my mind works. When you were younger, and you had a crush on someone, would you daydream of your life together? Well, I would too. Except I would go through every single living aspect, eventually mentally exhausting myself of said daydreamed relationship and be over it. We would have started dating, went through a whole relationship, and broken up all in the course of one daydream. I was ten.

If I have a craving for pasta, I don’t just want to microwave a can of Chef Boyardee (although that shit hits the spot on many occasions.) I want to get handmade raviolis from the Italian bakery down the street and make homemade pasta with fresh parmesan. I am both an over-thinker and an over-doer. It’s like both the gas and the brakes are being floored in my brain at the same time, which ultimately has lead to being overwhelmed, and under achieved.

I have seen myself in action at work where I just need to get shit done, and those are some moments in my life I have genuinely been proud of myself. Eliminating the needless overthinking and worrying, because there was literally no other choice led to amazing results. A forced focus that created a completed project. Now how to replicate this in my personal life:

  1. I make lists
  2. I parent myself to finish said list

For some people, this might be their version of overwhelming. Totally normal. To see 20 tasks where none of them have been started would be. For myself, if I think of something I need to do, my mind will go “Don’t forget you also need to do this project, and start the laundry, and respond to that email!’So now my one thing to do has overloaded my brain. Writing shit down allows my brain to focus on the task at hand, without worrying I might forget the other items. The overthinking brake pedal slowly releases.

I was watching a Mel Robbins youtube video, and she gave this amazing advice that stuck with me. She mentioned how you’re never going to want to do what you want to do. You’re always going to be tired, you’re always going to want to watch the movie. But like your parents when you were young telling you to make your bed or brush your teeth, you need to parent yourself. There is so much easy shit I don’t want to do on a daily basis, like when the remote is on the table when you just sat on the couch. Fuuuuuuuuck. I dont’ want to get up. You just gotta get up, or you’re never going to be able to rebinge Season 6 of Game of Thrones. Pick up the remote and you will be rewarded.

My 6 month list of to-do’s to getting happy (my goal):

  1. Be Consistent
  2. Self-Care
  3. Daily Meditation
  4. Get Healthy
  5. Therapy
  6. Solo Travel
  7. Read a book a week
  8. Yoga/Pilates 1x daily
  9. Join an Improv class
  10. Learn to code
  11. Learn tarot reading
  12. Start Blogging
  13. Take a theatre acting class
  14. Make an art piece a month
  15. Start my own business

I’ve already gotten a pretty good start. Everything is either something I have already done in the past, loved, and for some reason stopped doing. Or it is something that terrifies me (re: theatre class, starting a business) but secretly would fucking love. (I’ve always wanted to be an extra in a movie that has a three word line. More coffee hun? THAT’S ME! I’M WAITRESS #2!!) Or it is me learning something cool again, which I haven’t done in a couple of years. This list could look overwhelming…but I am done overthinking.

Is there anything you stopped doing you loved? Is there anything that you would love to do but are afraid?

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